On a recent date with a very nice Frenchman who had a more than nice French accent we got onto the topic of women and what they wear. I have since realised that this topic, much like religion and politics, should be taboo.
He, this lovely Frenchman who I hoped might be progressive (and he was when it came to people staying monogamous in relationships, he thought it was okay if they didn't) and might also laugh at my jokes (he didn't) said that women shouldn't 'over expose' themselves but rather dress to leave a little mystery about themselves.
A little mystery, eh?
This same sentiment was echoed a few days later by Tina Arena during a television interview. Asked why she never felt the need to objectify herself by posing near naked to sell her albums (a very well phrased question) she unfortunately responded with a very regressive statement alluding to wanting to maintain some 'mystery' about herself.
Mystery? What is this mystery women should imbue?
Hearing this 'mystery' statement for the second time this week I wanted to launch my dinner at the television screen. I know my angst may not seem reasonable because many a person would agree with their statements. I mean, why run around naked and exposed when covering up (though, how much is anyone's guess) will create this much desired 'mystery' - the effect of being loved, admired, desired and wanted?
But who are these women supposed to be 'mysterising (a made-up word)' themselves for?
It's the male, of course! Women are supposed to look mysterious for men, because ladies, you are nothing unless you are being looked at by a man - and a man wants mystery. Doesn't he?
When women are positoned and asked to dress the way a man wants them to dress - the question that has to be asked is, which man? Surely men are unique individuals and like different things? Don't some men like women to dress in jeans, others in trackpants, some like skirts, others prefer dresses etc? It's near impossible for women to dress to satisfy 'men' in the general sense.
Why can't women just wear what they want? Why do we feel the need to tell, discuss and suggest to women what is appropriate or inappropiate for them to wear?
Not enough make up, too much make up, shorter skirt, too short a skirt, show some clevage, that's too much clevage, dress sexy, that's slutty, dress like a vixen, dress like the-girl-next-door, dress for your age, that's too conservative, wear red, wear black, wear white, wear pink.... AAAAAAAAArgh!!!
Is it so inconcievable to think that maybe when a woman looks in the mirror she might actually like what she is wearing? I mean, she is an adult and chose it for herself, and she knows what she likes. But, as soon as we ask that same woman to view herself by another's standard (and mostly this tends to be male) she suddenly finds flaw after flaw after flaw?
Women need only to view themselves through their own standards of acceptance, free from societal, media and male opinions. Meaning: if a woman wants to dress in a mini skirt and crop top, or business pants and shirt, or a summer dress, or bikini, or a hessian sack and if she wants to put on a ton of make or no no make up or do whatever makes her feel happy that day then she should be able to do so without comment from others - male or female.
So, stuff that 'mystery' people keep quoting, away with the beautiful and pretty slogans, enough of the sexy, gorgeous, elegant, strong, classic, model, princess and everything else women 'should' be.
Simply put, if you don't like what a woman is wearing because it's not alligned with your beliefs, fashion sense, or personal opinion, just keep it to yourself and look elsewhere. Simple.